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People who are different are dangerous; they belong to another tribe; they want our lands and our women. We must marry, have children, reproduce the species. When we marry, we are authorized to take possession of the other person, body and souls. We must do jobs we detest because we are part of an organized society, and if everyone did what they wanted to do, the world would come to a standstill. We must buy jewelry; it identifies us with our tribe, just as body piercing identifies those of a different tribe. We must be amusing at all times and sneer at those who express their real feelings; it's dangerous for a tribe to allow its members to show their feelings. We must at all costs avoid saying 'No' beause people prefer those who always say 'Yes', and this allows us to survive in hostile territory. What other people think is more important than what we feel. Never make a fuss, it might attract the attentionof an enemy tribe. If you behave different you will be expelled from the tribe because you could infect others and destroy something that was extremely difficult to organize in the first place. We must always consider the look of our new cave, and if we don't have a clear idea of our own, then we must call in a decoratr who will do his best to show others what good taste we have. We must eat three meals a day, even if we're not hungry, and when we fail to fit the current ideal of beauty we must fast, even if we're starving. We must dress according to the dictates of fashion, make love whether we feel like it or not, kill in the name of our countries frontiers, wish time away so that retirement comes more quickly, elect politicians, complain about the cost of living, change our hairstyle, criticize anyone who is different, go to a religious service on Sunday, Saturday or Friday, depending on our religion, and there beg forgiveness for sins and puff ourselves up with pride because we know the truth and despise the other tribe, who worship another god. Our children must follow our footsteps; after all, we are older and know about the world. We must have a university degree even if we never get a job in the area of knowledge we were forced to study. We must study things we will never use, but which someone told us was important to know: algebra, trigonometry, the code of Hammurabi. We must never make our parents sad, even if this means giving up everything that makes us happy. We must play music quietly, talk quietly, weep in private, because I am the all-powerful Zahir, who lays down the rules and determines the distance between railway tracks, the meaning of success, the best way to love, the importance of rewards. People, does this ring any bells????
"So,what should I do?"I thought,now that I'm in a dark alley and he might put a knife on my throat asking me to give him my purse.Or maybe he was one of those serial killers who would spray something in my face to make me faint and then take me somewhere and rape me.Oh my God! All of this thinking seemed to take so long although it was only seconds when I took the decision and turned around and hit him with my purse.The guy immediately fell on the floor with a bleeding nose. I stood there for a moment(I dunno what kept me standing in the first place!) while the guy kept staring at me.It was too dark to see his features,all I could see is shadows and hear him breathing deeply.He took a napkin out of his jacket's pocket and wiped his nose from the blood and I'm still standing there watching him. He came closer to me and consequently I took a step backwards into a dim light. He stepped closer once more,into the light, and again I stepped backwards. I looked at him and couldn't breathe anymore. I felt my blood running through my veins very quickly that my heart would stop at any moment.I felt a cold shiver running through my arms reaching my nails.I was scared,yet, I didn't move an inch,I just couldn't!My brain is giving signals to my legs to run,yet my legs refuse to obey. It's as if my feet are stuck in the street's cement,and the more I keep standing the more I get scared.He was a tall dark man about 6ft 8in with long dark hair,his features were very simple.His eyes were very defined bordered by thick eyebrows.I kept staring at him until I was distracted by his soft,tender voice "Now I guess is the time that u tell me". HUH! Tell him what?Is he talking to me? "E..e..excuse me?Sir I guess you are mistaken I'm not.."
- " Aren't you tired of all of this?" he interrupted. I was standing there having no idea what he was talking about." why do you keep following me?" he continued.
- "ME?! Well, if I'm the one who's following you then why didn't you hit me with your purse instead?!"
-He smiled and said,"Well, I didn't bring any of my stuff with me,and.. wait a minute, don't try to play smart and get me off point.Answer my question,why are you following me?Why is it wherever I go I see you?". Then we both were silent for a moment, as for myself I didn't know what to reply,I just couldn't think,"I...I..I need t..t..to go",I said, grabbing my bag from the floor and finally I could move once again. I walked backwards and when I finally started to walk faster I was about to turn around when he grabbed my hand and said, "Tomorrow, 4pm starbucks cafe,the one around the corner" and left. Astonished I was to all what happened, I opened my hand to find his napkin in my hand stained with his blood. I watched him walk away in his long dark coat until he vanished completely. I gathered myself and walked him,totally stoned as if I just got out of bed,didn't drink my coffee yet and still can't figure out what's going on around me. All what I was thinking of was, "should I go tomorrow?". I reached my appartment,unlocked the door, stepped inside and locked it behind me, "why am I thinking of all this in the first place? He's a complete stranger to me why should I have a cup of coffee with him? He could be a serial killer and I'm his next victim.Ok, I can't deny there was something about him but I can't use my instinct all the time". All of this thinking and with all day's effort I lied down on my sofa and went into deep sleep.
I woke up finding myself on the floor and the phone was ringing. "Hello?" I asked still sleeping and can't make any sense "Mariam who?Ah Mariam,what's up? Oh my gosh ! Ok Ok! Give me 20 min".I jumped from the floor ,run to the bathroom, took a shower and got dressed up for my boss' daughter's wedding all in 20 min,that's a score! 5 min later,Mariam passed by and together we went to the wedding.
It was a wonderful night,yet all I kept thinking about that guy,"should I go?why he said that I was the one who was following him?" and a lot of other questions I had in my mind but I was interrupted by a voice," You look astonishing tonight! You were born to were that dress!"
-"Well,thank you sir! Your daughter is pretty much beautiful herself".
-"Yes,she is! I'm glad that you came tonight,although you missed the reception,yet you made it up for all of us with your appearance tonight my child"
-"It's an honor,Sir.I'm really glad that your daughter made it to the isle after all those years".
We both laughed,his daughter was well-known or her many adventures with men for like 10 years since she was 18! I wished the bride and the groom an ever-after happiness,wished my boss goodnight and left.I couldn't stay till the end of the night as I was wearied out. All I could think about was my bed and starbucks!
...To be continued
Shot at 1 pm but I had to put the effects as I usually do. Not bad for a beginner or what?!
If interested check out this..
http://ayatseifelnasr.deviantart.com/
Just like everyday, I was walking down the street to take the bus to work. I was standing at the bus stop when I saw a little girl staring at me, consequently I looked at her and smiled and continued reading Women In Love, the book I bought last year at the book fair by D.H. Lawrence. Later, I over-heard the girl asking her mom whether I was an angel or not! Her mother laughed and asked "why honey?","She looks like one!" the girl said. The mother smiled, kissed her daughter and said,"Hun' we can't see angels,yet they're among us everywhere".The girl looked at me again then looked at the sky and sighed. I assumed that she thought I was an angel because I was wearing a white coat. I smiled for the thought and kept reading until the bus came.
I arrived at work early as usual, went up to the cafeteria & took my cappuccino back to my office. As I was reading the mail, Mariam rushed into the office screaming "The boss asked about you last night,why didn't you come to his daughter's reception party?". I didn't reply, I meandered for a few minutes while Mariam kept looking at me, "There's something different about you today, you look like.."
- "An angel?!" I interrupted her.
-She laughed and said "Well yes! Not an angel literary but u seem unusually peaceful".
- " So you say that I'm always stressed and nervous?"I asked smiling.
- " No sorry, I didn't mean so. I meant,everyday u seemed having a lot to think about. A lot of things going on your mind, but today you seem..".
- " Happy?",I interrupted again. " Well,yes I am. I woke up today having this feeling of relief". I thought for a moment and smiled, "And a little girl at the bus stop today thought I was an angel too!Maybe I'm considering becoming one!".We both laughed and then she went back to her office.
After a long day at work, I went back home exhausted. I had to cover all the work I had for tomorrow because I'll be going to my boss's daughter's wedding. I passed by Mac, ordered a meal and took it home. As I was crossing the street, I felt I was being stalked. I looked behind me and saw a man walking right behind me but not noticing me at all. So,I kept walking till I reached my block. Having a lot of things in my hand,I had to put Mac's meal and the diet coke on the floor until I get my keys out of the bag. As usual, my bag was a mess,everything I had in it from lip balm to a hairbrush!I kept looking in the bag till I heard their ring,so I kept moving my hand in the bag and got them! I opened the building's main door and walked up the stairs.But again I heard footsteps behind me so I stopped and the footsteps stopped. I looked around me and downstairs but there was no one. "I'm way too tired that I'm starting imagining things",I thought.I took a deep breath and climbed up to my apartment,opened the door,locked the door from the inside,and threw my bag and myself on the sofa!
The meal was too good that I didn't leave anything behind,I ate all of it! Or maybe because I was too tried and too hungry,whatever! Anyway I washed my face and washed up for the afternoon prayers. Surprisingly,this was the first time during my prayers that I didn't get distracted by my neighbors dog barking or me thinking of what I need to buy or do. I was so peaceful and calm. Anyway, after I prayed I opened my closet looking for something to wear for the wedding. " I remember I had a purple dress that I wore last year at my cousin's wedding",I thought; so I kept looking for it but I couldn't find it anywhere. "Never mind, anyway I needed to buy a new one, that dress wouldn't have suited me any longer now that I've lost 5 pounds",I said to myself. So, I decided to wake up early & go to the Mall to find something to wear and buy a pair of shoes for the dress.
The next morning it was a beautiful sunny day. I drank my cappuccino jumped into my favorite light blue jeans and a brown jacket. As usual I kept looking for something comfortable to wear in feet, "something that won't hurt my feet if I walked a lot,and easy to take off if I needed to try the sandals on..hmmm..aha!", a beautiful brown ballerina my best friend got me for my last birthday.Quickly I put it on and ran downstairs happily just as a little girl who's happy to go to buy a new dress for the feast! But,as usual I forgot my bag so I ran upstairs again, took the bag, locked the door behind me and went down.
The Mall was too crowded unusually, but I managed to find a couple of stores which had a collection of cocktail and evening dresses, but they were a bit pricey for me that if I got one of these dresses I won't afford to buy a pair of sandals for it, so I had to look for something a little less expensive for me. I walked all day in the Mall but couldn't find anything I liked and not expensive,so I decided to borrow a dress from a friend of mine who's almost about my size. As I was leaving,again I felt someone was watching me,so I looked behind me but it was too crowded to know who it was, so I ran out of the Mall.
I called Sara on her cell phone and she said that the dress is available and that I could drop by now if I wanted. So,again I was happy that I found something to wear for the night. On my way I bought Sara her favorite chocolate as I always do before I go to her place. I reached the building,rang on the intercom and she opened the door for me; and when I reached up to the 3rd floor I already found her standing in front of her apartment waiting for me. I kissed her, gave her the chocolate and we went in. She showed me a wonderful long yellow dress with a pair of golden sandals. I laughed out of joy when I tried it on and found that it perfectly fitted me,"And there's a purse too!",Sara said playfully showing me a little golden purse. I was so happy that I could scream! We sat and talked a little then I had to go to get ready for the wedding.
Since Sara's place wasn't too far from mine, I walked home. I was so happy that I forgot to buy something to have for lunch. As I was walking again I felt someone was walking behind me and this time I was certain.
....To be continued
Do you think this pic. is considered absurd art? what do u think the meaning behind it? When I first saw it in my friend's blog I was actually speechless and made me think "Am I gonna reach that stage?Am I gonna live like this?" I dun wanna tell you what's my interpretation of that pic so as not to distract you. So, just tell me wat did YOU think when you first saw it. Waiting for your feedback..
I'm happy,but why? Why now? Why not before? Why did everything go wrong? Why after all u've put me through I still feel this shiver when I hear ur voice? Why do u let go that easy every time u feel we're not meant to be,and why do u want me back again? Why are u that weak when it comes to commitment and why is it that easy to come back? Why can't I just accept the idea that maybe u're not the one and why is it so easy for me to accept ur pleas for forgiveness? Why can't I love u and why can't I hate u? Hate u? For what? For leaving me whenever u feel our love is too strong to handle all by urself? Who said u're all by urself,where am I? R u excluding me from ur life, or do I only feel this because I'm very into ur life? who said I don't love u..I do,but not for who u r but for whom u are craving to be. Nonsense what I'm talking about, am I still gonna wait for u to be someone whom u might never be?!! Yes I will coz I know u can, but why do I have all this faith in u? Why do I stick up to u and always be beside whenever u need me? Is it U who need me or the other way around? I need u? Do I? Why? For what you gave me before, or for what u still have to give? Are u still willing to give me,if not then why do u want me back? Oh yes, u didn't say u wanted me back! Hell no! Each time u say I love u is a promise of commitment! Ah yes, Ok,I do say I love u but I don't really mean it with what all it means but at that moment yes I'm loving you,why? Why is it only in a moment particularly that I love u that romantically and deeply? It's not that I feel something each and every single moment,but...it's not love, it's not deeply and passionately as always,why? Do u have the same feeling,the ups and downs? Do u,this time, really want to stick by me?Do u still wanna be part of me, my life? Do u ever wanna fight for what we had,have and will have? Do u wanna tire yourself for me? Am I always gonna have these doubts? Am I willing to tire myself to find the answers?God, help me!
For all those gals who are frustrated by "Wust Al-balad" incident,here are 15 reason why it is great being a girl;) ..
1-U can be attracted to someone just because they're really funny.
2-U can quickly end any fight simply by crying.(Does this knock any doors:D!!)
3-U never have to open doors for men.
4-In the bus,U don't have to leave ur chair for a man.
5-U never have to spend a 2 month's salary on a ring!
6-In a cafe,if someone takes ur seat u don't have to hit them!
7-U can improve ur appearance with make up without ppl thinking u're a wierdo!
8-U don't have hair no ur back.( yeah grose!!)
9-U don't have to shave everyday.( I guess U don't have to shave from the begining!!)
10-U can dress urself without looking like geeks.
11-U'll never regret piercing ur ears.
12-U'll never regret a decision u take bec it always depends only on either on the heart or mind, not on a 3rd organ!!!!!(no offence)
13-U can hug ur friends without ppl wondering if U were gay.
14-On dates,U don't have to pay(bliss!!)
15- And last but not least,girls can be worshipped( I mean seriously in some countries women are worshipped for bieng the source of life and bla bla bla),so gals wait for the next post I'll write down the name of that country!!!
